Limiting Beliefs

     For the past four weeks, I've been collaborating with my friend, fellow martial artist, and personal trainer extraordinaire, Christine Eldridge, on a program called Whole Life Solution. It's a mix of fitness training and life coaching topics aimed at bringing about sustainable healthy changes. We have 10 enthusiastic participants, and I'm loving every minute of it. What happens in WLS stays in WLS, but let's just say that I'm learning a lot and enjoying the process of creating and delivering this program.
      One concept that I'm teaching in both the group and with my individual clients is that of Limiting Beliefs. Here's the gist of it:

• Our underlying beliefs dictate how we think, feel, and act.
• Some beliefs are so deeply embedded that we don't realize we are thinking them.
• Beliefs may come from our parents, culture, religion, friend groups, social norms, interpretation of feedback, or past experiences. 
• A "limiting belief" is an underlying thought (conscious or not) that constrains us in some way.
• Limiting beliefs can be personal ("I don't deserve to be happy") or general ("Mothers shouldn't work full time.")
• Limiting beliefs include the fear of what others will think ("People will think I'm crazy for pursuing my dream to be a rodeo clown.")

The problem with limiting beliefs is that they are often so ingrained that we accept them as truth.  We don't realize that we can think differently.  The goal with this work is to change our limiting belief into a more empowering thought. For example, if your limiting belief is that other people will think you're crazy, an empowering replacement is that you should do what makes you happy, regardless of what others think. Now...there's a lot of thought work and practice that has to go into that change of mindset, but you do have choices when it comes to what you think.
          Consider this: Your mind is like a  web browser. What you put into the search bar is extremely indicative of what you will get out. Think about cats as pets (I'm going for something controversial, but not political...haha). If you put "Cats are the best pets" into your search bar, you will get tons of pictures of cute and cuddly felines. However, if you put "Cats are the worst pets," you will get plenty of images like this:  

          Our brains are similar.   For instance, if you think "I'm not an athlete" and that's how you identify, you will notice every time you stumble, get out of breath, miss a catch or do something clumsy. In fact, you probably won't even attempt physical activities because you have this limiting belief about yourself. All of this equals evidence that you are not an athlete, and the limiting belief becomes more solidified. However, if you start to think, "I can do this" or "I can become more athletic" or "I've got skills," you will flip the search and start to notice when you coordinate all your limbs or when you run up the stairs without feeling light-headed. You will be more likely to try athletic endeavors and you will be more forgiving of yourself when you do make mistakes. 
         We often tell kids that when they say "I can't," they are probably right. On the other hand, if those same children say "I can," they are also probably right. This is the power of your beliefs--what you believe about yourself, your abilities, and the greater world around you. As adults, we don't always take this to heart. We get jaded by negative feedback. We get set in our ways. We get trapped in a default version of our lives and fear the effort and response should we try to change things up. But the idea that we have to continue to live how we are currently living simply because we are adults is itself a limiting belief. It is NEVER too late to make positive changes. What limiting beliefs are holding you back? Start with your thoughts. Let me know if I can help. 

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